Bedtime fading: a gentle method for long, difficult bedtimes

Bedtime fading is a way to make falling asleep easier by working with your child's body clock instead of against it. You temporarily move bedtime later, to around the time your child actually falls asleep, so they go to bed genuinely sleepy. Once they're falling asleep quickly, you bring bedtime earlier in small steps, often about 15 minutes at a time, until you reach the bedtime you want. The morning wake-up time stays the same throughout. It's one of the gentler behavioural sleep methods, and it has been tested in babies, toddlers and preschoolers.

What is bedtime fading?

The American Academy of Sleep Medicine (AASM) describes faded bedtime as temporarily delaying bedtime to more closely match the child's natural sleep onset time, then fading it earlier as the child succeeds in falling asleep quickly. It's usually paired with positive routines: a set, enjoyable and quiet bedtime routine that becomes a cue for sleep.

The logic is simple. If your child is put to bed at 7 pm but isn't sleepy until 8:30 pm, they spend that time lying awake, calling out, or getting up. KidsHealth NZ notes that putting children to bed when they aren't tired can lead to bedtime struggles. Starting at a time when your child is ready to sleep makes falling asleep quick and easy, and you then shift that success earlier.

Where does bedtime fading come from?

It comes from behavioural sleep medicine rather than a parenting book. The AASM's 2006 practice parameters list "delayed bedtime with removal from bed/positive bedtime routines" among recommended treatments for bedtime problems and night waking. Australian researchers have tested it with babies and with preschoolers, and the version on KidsHealth NZ credits material from the Royal Children's Hospital Melbourne's Centre for Community Child Health.

What age is bedtime fading used from?

Research has used it across a wide age range:

A review by Kang and Kim says bedtime fading is often used for older children for whom extinction may not be appropriate. For babies, sources that discuss sleep training generally put it after 6 months; the NCT advises against sleep training before then.

How do you do bedtime fading, step by step?

1. Keep a sleep diary for a week. Write down when you start the routine, when your child actually falls asleep, night wakings, the morning wake time and naps. This tells you their natural sleep time.
2. Choose your goal bedtime and a fixed wake-up time. Kang and Kim say a consistent morning wake-up time is essential. Wake your child at that time every day, including weekends.
3. Set a temporary bedtime at about the time your child usually falls asleep, as KidsHealth NZ describes.
4. Do a calm, predictable routine leading into that bedtime. The NHS suggests starting a wind-down routine about 30 minutes before your child usually falls asleep, and avoiding screens for 30 to 60 minutes before bed. See bedtime routine.
5. Settle your child as you normally would. Bedtime fading changes the timing, not your settling style.
6. Hold that bedtime until they're falling asleep quickly, usually for a few nights.
7. Move bedtime earlier in small steps. Kang and Kim describe moving bedtime 15 minutes earlier over successive nights; KidsHealth NZ suggests 15 minutes every few days. The NHS suggests 5 to 10 minutes each week, or 15 minutes if bedtime is very late.
8. Slow down if needed. KidsHealth NZ warns that moving bedtime too quickly can make it harder to fall asleep. If your child starts taking longer again, go back to the last bedtime that worked for a few nights.
9. Stop when you reach your goal bedtime, and keep the routine and wake-up time steady.
10. Keep everyone on the same plan. KidsHealth NZ advises that everyone caring for your child follows the same approach.

What about getting out of bed?

Some programs for older children add what researchers call response cost. Kang and Kim describe it as taking the child out of bed if they can't fall asleep, doing a quiet, non-arousing activity for a set time (usually about 30 minutes), then trying again. This is mainly used with older children; for babies, talk to your GP or child-health nurse before trying it.

What do the first week or two look like?

Here's a fictional example — adjust to your child. Mia is 2 years old. Her bedtime is 7 pm, but she lies awake calling out until about 8:15 pm most nights. Her parents want lights-out at 7:30 pm, and she's woken at 6:30 am every day.

If Mia had started taking a long time to fall asleep at 7:45 pm, her parents would have gone back to 8:00 pm for a few more nights before trying again. A bigger shift takes longer: the KidsHealth NZ example moves bedtime 2 hours earlier over about 17 or 18 nights.

Check that the new schedule leaves enough total sleep. The AASM's recommended amounts, including naps, are 12 to 16 hours a day for 4 to 12 months, 11 to 14 hours for 1 to 2 years and 10 to 13 hours for 3 to 5 years.

Does bedtime fading work? What the evidence says

The evidence is modest but encouraging, and it's one of the better-studied gentle methods.

• Babies. In the Gradisar trial, 43 babies aged 6–16 months were randomised to graduated extinction, bedtime fading or sleep education. Both active methods improved sleep, with large decreases in the time taken to fall asleep. Graduated extinction also brought large decreases in night waking. Cortisol (a stress hormone) showed small-to-moderate declines in both groups, mothers' stress fell, and 12 months later there were no differences in attachment, emotions or behaviour.
• Toddlers and preschoolers. In the Cooney open trial of 21 children aged 1.5–4 years, time taken to fall asleep fell from about 23 to 13 minutes a night, bedtime tantrums fell, and gains held at a 2-year follow-up. There was no comparison group.
• Bedtime tantrums. Adams and Rickert's trial of 36 toddlers and preschoolers found both positive routines with a gradually earlier bedtime and graduated extinction reduced tantrums compared with no treatment. Parents in the positive routines group also reported better marital satisfaction.
• Reviews. A 2006 AASM review found support for bedtime fading and positive routines, and the AASM rated the approach as effective at "guideline" level, while finding insufficient evidence to recommend any single method over another.

The studies are small, and none can promise how quickly any one child will respond.

Who does bedtime fading suit, and who doesn't it suit?

It may suit:

• babies over 6 months, toddlers and preschoolers who take a long time to fall asleep or fight bedtime
• children whose bedtime is earlier than their body is ready for
• families who don't want to use crying-based methods

It may be less helpful when:

• the main problem is night waking, not falling asleep. In the Gradisar trial, graduated extinction had the bigger effect on wakings; see check and console or night wakings.
• your child can't fall asleep without you. Pairing fading with gradual retreat may help.
• your child may be overtired. If they're melting down in the evening and napping poorly, a later bedtime may not be the answer; see overtired baby and talk it through with your child-health nurse.
• there might be a medical cause, such as snoring or breathing problems (see below).

What about parental presence fading?

Some families fade themselves rather than the clock. In parental presence fading, you stay with your child as they fall asleep, then gradually move further away. Pregnancy, Birth and Baby calls this transition settling or camping out, recommends it for babies 6 months or older, and describes moving further away over about 1 to 4 weeks. The RACGP describes camping out as reducing your presence over 1–3 weeks. Our gradual retreat guide covers it in full, and the two can be combined.

What safety rules apply, and when should I get help?

For babies, keep every sleep safe while you change the timing. NICHD Safe to Sleep advises placing babies on their back for every sleep until 1 year old, on a firm, flat surface with only a fitted sheet and nothing soft or loose, and room-sharing for at least the first 6 months. Toddlers who have moved to a bed need a safe room; see cot to bed.

Put the plan on hold if your child is unwell, and get help:

• Call your local emergency number (000 in Australia, 999 in the UK, 911 in the US) if your child is struggling to breathe, is blue, grey or very pale, is floppy or hard to wake, or is having a seizure, as the NHS urgent help guide advises. HealthyChildren.org also says to call emergency services if a child's breathing stops for more than 20 seconds or their skin turns pale, bluish or greyish.
• Tell your GP promptly if your child snores often, has breathing problems at night, or is sleepy, inattentive or struggling with behaviour in the day. HealthyChildren.org lists these as possible signs of sleep apnoea and says to tell your child's doctor right away.
• Mention it at your next check if bedtime is still a struggle after a few weeks of consistent fading. A GP or child-health nurse can look for other causes and help you plan.

How does bedtime fading compare with other methods?

For a side-by-side look at all options, see the sleep training overview.